Describe Billie Jo's relationship with her father. Say you were Billie Jo.......if you were in her position, what do you think you would have done to improve your relationship with your father? Think deeply and straight from the heart....
I strongly understand the relationship between Billie Jo and her father. If I were Billie Jo then I would have to first start off slow with my father. I would talk to him occasionally and ask him questions where it leads to a conversation.This relationship will slowly start to grow since we would have gotten to know each other properly. After the death of my mother, I would understand straight away how my father feels. At that point us two are all thats left so we have to connect with each other the best we can.
After Ma's death Billie Jo and her father got very distant, he stopped talking much and she refused to open up to him and share feelings as well experiences. I know that the physiological after effects of experiencing a loved one death are very drastically. Still, I find it odd that they don't talk when they have the exact same feelings.
I have never been in such a situation, because every time I would begin to slip away from my father, he would grab me tight again and spend time as well as listen and talk to me more often. This makes it difficult for me to understand the situation and propose a solution.
What seems to me the most suitable suggestion is her to ask questions to her father, about deep themes that both can relate to. Many people may think asking directly very profound questions is not appropriate, I would usually agree, but as in this case we're talking about her father, I think one should be allowed to be direct and open to him.
I do not guaranty my recommendation, though, as I, again, am not experienced in this topic.
A very sound recommendation indeed. I would certainly pay heed to it. I think even if her father rejects her, Billi Jo should still make that effort to reconnect.
If I was Billie Jo, I would understand the pain and sorrow my father is feeling as he has known and lived with Ma more than me. I wouldn't be so upset about the fact that my dad was not helping his wife but instead drinking away his distress. I would teach my father different activities to help distract him from the event that has happened. Lastly, what I would do is discuss numerous thoughts about what has happened with my dad and slowly let him ease back into the right track.
"Drinking away his distress" is not something her father should be doing. It might help him temporarily forget his problems, but will not help in the long run. In fact it may create further problems to the family.
Well from what I see, I think her father was not a person that dealed with feelings by sharing them to others, he was a very closed person. Me being Billie Jo, I would dealed with the situation by putting his mind on a different path maybe by doing something he likes, but obviously i cant get him used to this. So I would constantly remind him of his responsibilities and this should keep him busy and time will slowly make him forget about the situation.
The word is 'dealt' not 'dealed' in the past tense, Krishna. I like the suggestion of 'putting his mind on a different path' - it is a very doable suggestion, provided father is open to be open minded. You speak with maturity....
After Ma's death, Jo and her father didn't talk much. If I was Billie Jo, I would wait for father to talk to me first for sometime. If it takes to long time, then I would do something for him,but I'm not going to talk to him for a while. I mean if he is sick, then I will put medicines and water next to his bed or put some snacks while his busy with working. If I keep doing that then he will say something, and then we will slowly get close to each other and forgive each other. I'm sure it will take long time, but still I would try this way.
After the accident, Billie Jo and her father did not have much of a close relationship. They were closer before Ma went. After they drifted apart completley.
I think making a connection to this is a little bit difficult because I have had a bad relatioship with my dad. But if I were Billy Jo I would first let my dad cool off. Make sure that his mind is clear. Then I would try to engage more conversations with him. Try and make him understand that he is the only parent I have left. And that if he dies I will miss him truly.
I strongly understand the relationship between Billie Jo and her father. If I were Billie Jo then I would have to first start off slow with my father. I would talk to him occasionally and ask him questions where it leads to a conversation.This relationship will slowly start to grow since we would have gotten to know each other properly. After the death of my mother, I would understand straight away how my father feels. At that point us two are all thats left so we have to connect with each other the best we can.
ReplyDeleteVery empathetic post. Well done, Nathan.
DeleteAfter Ma's death Billie Jo and her father got very distant, he stopped talking much and she refused to open up to him and share feelings as well experiences.
ReplyDeleteI know that the physiological after effects of experiencing a loved one death are very drastically. Still, I find it odd that they don't talk when they have the exact same feelings.
I have never been in such a situation, because every time I would begin to slip away from my father, he would grab me tight again and spend time as well as listen and talk to me more often. This makes it difficult for me to understand the situation and propose a solution.
What seems to me the most suitable suggestion is her to ask questions to her father, about deep themes that both can relate to. Many people may think asking directly very profound questions is not appropriate, I would usually agree, but as in this case we're talking about her father, I think one should be allowed to be direct and open to him.
I do not guaranty my recommendation, though, as I, again, am not experienced in this topic.
A very sound recommendation indeed. I would certainly pay heed to it. I think even if her father rejects her, Billi Jo should still make that effort to reconnect.
DeleteIf I was Billie Jo, I would understand the pain and sorrow my father is feeling as he has known and lived with Ma more than me. I wouldn't be so upset about the fact that my dad was not helping his wife but instead drinking away his distress. I would teach my father different activities to help distract him from the event that has happened. Lastly, what I would do is discuss numerous thoughts about what has happened with my dad and slowly let him ease back into the right track.
ReplyDelete"Drinking away his distress" is not something her father should be doing. It might help him temporarily forget his problems, but will not help in the long run. In fact it may create further problems to the family.
DeleteWell from what I see, I think her father was not a person that dealed with feelings by sharing them to others, he was a very closed person. Me being Billie Jo, I would dealed with the situation by putting his mind on a different path maybe by doing something he likes, but obviously i cant get him used to this. So I would constantly remind him of his responsibilities and this should keep him busy and time will slowly make him forget about the situation.
ReplyDeleteThe word is 'dealt' not 'dealed' in the past tense, Krishna.
DeleteI like the suggestion of 'putting his mind on a different path' - it is a very doable suggestion, provided father is open to be open minded. You speak with maturity....
After Ma's death, Jo and her father didn't talk much. If I was Billie Jo, I would wait for father to talk to me first for sometime. If it takes to long time, then I would do something for him,but I'm not going to talk to him for a while. I mean if he is sick, then I will put medicines and water next to his bed or put some snacks while his busy with working. If I keep doing that then he will say something, and then we will slowly get close to each other and forgive each other. I'm sure it will take long time, but still I would try this way.
ReplyDeleteAfter the accident, Billie Jo and her father did not have much of a close relationship. They were closer before Ma went. After they drifted apart completley.
ReplyDeleteI think making a connection to this is a little bit difficult because I have had a bad relatioship with my dad. But if I were Billy Jo I would first let my dad cool off. Make sure that his mind is clear. Then I would try to engage more conversations with him. Try and make him understand that he is the only parent I have left. And that if he dies I will miss him truly.